I'am

I am who I am.

Dear Self

Dear Self,

You are lame. Grow up.

Love, Self

P.s... you're also overweight and fugly. Please fix this ASAP.

The Fattie's Post

Dieting sucks, I hate my life. Actually, I just hate my body because it requires me to diet. Some people are naturally a size 1 and don't ever have to worry about that sort of thing because they'll never be any bigger no matter how much they eat.

I'm so hungry that it almost makes me want to rip my hair out.

Today I went to cheesecake factory (not a dieter's place to go) only because I wanted to see my friends. I split something with a friend and had one slice of a tiny pizza. The rest were eaten by the vultures. Then one decided to order a slice of upside down pineapple cheesecake for all of use to share, which I had a lick of. Clearly, this is torturous for someone that loves food as much as I. Then we went to the movies and a friend rustled in the doggie bag, only to briing out the leftover pizza and passed it to another in front of me.

Afterwards, we went to Starbucks and they both ordered tasty things. This was way past my eating curfew and so I passed up the Green tea blackberry frappucino that I have been craving since its debut date. It didn't help that my friend that ordered it took about 2 sips and offered the rest to whoever wanted it...but again, I let it go.

I really have to wonder if all this torture is worth it at all in the end. I feel as though a) I'll never see the results anyway b) Even if I get there, I'll let myself go within a week of achieving it because food makes me too happy

Is the pay off of being healthy actually bigger than the satisfaction I get from eating?? I really have to wonder, because it's clear that there's nothing I love more than food. Seriously.

It's been many times that people watch me in awe as I eat whatever food in front of me and receive the comment "You make food look *so* good"...Though I've never watched myself, it seems that I have the most heavenly and orgasmic look when eating and even makes others happy while watching. I don't know how I'll survive because most outings with friends involve eating, drinking, etc etc. My eating curfew goes out the window and I start to misbehave. My social life will suffer and I grow even more aggravated. What to do??

*sigh* Oh, how I miss you food.